Sunday, November 11, 2012

WTFckery or Not? You Decide

Hey, ho here comes the WTF!

1. This beautiful yet chilling photo is the perfect example of how mother nature can destroy so much. Lower Manhattan was plunged into darkness for 5 days because of the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy:

From Reuters: "At a press conference, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo estimated the damage done to his state by Hurricane Sandy at $33 billion and to the region at $50 billion. The governor’s estimate exceeded that of disaster modeler EQECAT, which put total insured losses at $10 billion to $20 billion and economic losses at $30 billion to $50 billion on Nov. 1. The EQECAT numbers dueled with the projections of AIR Worldwide, another risk modeler, which pegged insured losses at $7 billion to $15 billion at about the same time."

2. MASSIVE PUBLISHING WTFCKERY: For the Twilight fan Fiction (pulled to publish) WTFckery files. Why would you announce, let alone your publisher that what you're publishing is Twilight fan fiction? You really expect people to respect you as an author? Your respectability factor plummets right from the start. How is this legal and why do so many people not care? Jut because E.L. James got away with it? What a sad, sad trend, regardless if someone changes their fan fiction drastically because the moment it's been uploaded on a fan fiction forum or site, it's tainted. I'm waiting for the day an author of an original piece of work ends up suing those who publish their fan fiction for big money. This is the ultimate WTFckery in all of publishing From THR:

"Thanks to the success of "Fifty Shades of Grey," a reimagined version of "The Office" called "Beautiful Bastard" will be published by Simon & Schuster in February 2013. One of the first breakout online fanfiction hits based on Twilight has scored a two-book deal with Gallery Books.

The Office, which reimagined the Edward Cullen-Bella Swan relationship as a steamy love/hate romance between a boss and his assistant, was one of the pioneers of the Twilight fanfic genre, generating more than two million downloads, before being taken offline by the author in 2009.

Beautiful Bastard, a reworked version of The Office written by Christina Hobbs and Lauren Billings under the pen name Christina Lauren, is scheduled for publication on Feb. 12, 2013. A sequel, Beautiful Stranger, will be released on May 28, 2013.

Simon & Schuster’s Gallery imprint bought the rights to the story in a pre-emptive situation for what insiders describe as a “substantial” advance."

3. Some WTFckery books to tickle your fancy:

A total play on everything romance with the most original title ever?

Synopsis: ROMANCE NOVEL—the unabridged, unauthorized comedic look at the bestselling vampire series that will leave you wondering who the hell ever believed vampires could “sparkle.” And you’ll laugh…all the way to the bathroom!

Smella Rosepetal must find a millionaire husband to finance her baby’s heart transplant. She flies home to her deputy father’s ranch in Pitchforks, Texas, where she falls in love with Deadward Forest, a wealthy environmentalist vampire.

When a deranged murderer is on the loose in Pitchforks, killing romance heroines, Deadward assumes Smella would be safer without him. Smella turns to her childhood friend, Snake Long, for comfort. But Snake doesn’t have the money to save her baby, so Smella places herself in peril in a desperate hunt for a rich husband.

Time is running out for Smella’s baby, and she must escape from the Australian Outback and face down Flabio, an overweight and disgruntled, aspiring cover model, plus enraged vampire wives and their homosexual, vampire, cowboy husbands, a jealous were-gerbil, James Bond, a drunk rodeo clown and Smella’s strange boyfriend who wants to drain her blood, yet is repulsed by her smell.

The title pretty much speaks for itself:

Green Giant veggies, anyone?

4. This sounds so cheesy, but since I'm a wine ho, I would so drink a bottle of Amazon wine. From Forbes:

" announced the launch of Amazon Wine, offering more than 1,000 wines from wineries around the country. The company said that starting today customers can ship up to six bottles of wine for $9.99. At launch, shipping will be available to California, Connecticut, Florida, Idaho, Illinois, Iowa, Nebraska, Nevada, North Carolina, Oregon, Washington, Wyoming and the District of Columbia."

5. Because every man must have a Beardo, otherwise known as Fake Facial Hair Accessory. From Fab:

"The month of moustaches and mayhem is upon us. Back on Fab in order to keep chins warm and upper lips covered, this collection by Beardo features ideal gifts for everyone on your holiday list. From the pre-pubescent to the Grizzly Adams, these furry products are guaranteed to put more than a smile on your face." Only $29.

6. I wonder how many people will sign up to be test subjects for this? From Huff Po Weird News:

"Could sex with robots help extend human life spans? Some futurists seem to think so. A Nov. 7 article on the futurist website Transhumanity argues that robot lovers could help extend life spans by giving users mind-blowing "longevity orgasms".

Transhumanity elaborates:
"[Sexbots will] be more desirable, patient, eager, and altruistic than their meat-bag competition, plus they’ll be uploaded with supreme sex-skills from millennia of erotic manuals, archives and academic experiments, and their anatomy will feature sexplosive devices... They’ll offer us quadruple-tongued cunnilingus, open-throat silky fellatio, deliriously gentle kissing, transcendent nipple tweaking, g-spot massage & prostate milking dexterity, plus 2,000 varieties of coital rhythm with scented lubes."
7. Clothes worn by famous people are beyond expensive. $480k for Judy Garland's Dorothy dress from The Wizard of Oz? I guess you only wear it once a year at Halloween. From Deadline Hollywood: 

"Judy Garland wore an iconic blue gingham from Kansas to Emerald City and back in The Wizard Of Oz. And this weekend that dress fetched a cool green $480,000 at Julien’s Auctions in Beverly Hills. Steve McQueen’s racing jacket went for $50,000. The prop watch worn by John Belushi in The Blues Brothers went for $15,000 and his Blues Brothers sunglasses brought $16,640. Jaclyn Smith’s dress from the original Charlie’s Angels TV series brought $15,000. A Jayne Mansfield cat print jumpsuit sold for $16,250, and Julie Andrews’ dress from The Sound of Music cost $38,400. Marilyn Monroe’s purple skirt from River of No Return brought $50,000."

8. It took me the longest time to see anything. Do you see them? And when you do, do you know what they are?

 9. Poor Elmo cake. From Cakewrecks:

10. And your Regretsy WTFckery is the perfect mask for the BDSM lover in your life:

I hope you have enjoyed this week's best in WTFckery!



Blodeuedd said...

Sexbots, well aint that lovely

Heather Massey said...

All I can say is that it's about time someone got hip to the rugged sex appeal of Yukon Cornelius.

Kristin said...

I am on board with the wine thing. I'm glad to see that CA is included! :)

Sophia (FV) said...

Bahahah, that mask!!