Everyone Loves a Hero Winners!

The 2 winners have been picked for their own copy of Marie Force's Everyone Loves a Hero!

Johanna R Jochum & Eva / TXBookjunkie

Please email me at katiebabsgATgmailDOTcom with your mailing address so you can get your prize.

Thanks everyone for entering.

A Lot Like Love Book Review *Julie James*

There’s a whole lot to love about A Lot Like Love from Julie James. This is a superb read, plain and simple. My inner fan girl cannot get enough of Julie’s books and this may possibly be my favorite one of hers thus far. The writing is crisp, the dialogue is witty and the sexual tension is perfect without overtaking the plot. If you’re longing for a great contemporary read, look no further. Julie James breathes life into a genre that so many say is dying.

A Lot Like Love takes place in Chicago, Illinois. FBI agent, Nick McCall has just come off of an undercover job where he helped take down twenty-seven dirty cops. The former Brooklyn boy is taking time off so he can go back home for his mother’s sixtieth birthday party. But a sudden wrench is thrown in his plans. His boss asks him to help out on a case regarding Roberto Martino, who runs the largest crime syndicate in Chicago. They believe they can finally take him down through Xander Eckhart, a well-known restaurant and nightclub owner, who also has a wine bar that caters to the rich. They believe Eckhart is laundering drug money for Martino. The plan is to place a bug in Eckhart’s office during an exclusive charity wine event on Valentine’s Day that costs five thousand dollars a person. An Agent Huxley will be going as a guest while Eckhart acts as a consultant of sorts. The problem is that Huxley needs to go as someone’s guest, and that’s where Jordan Rhodes comes in. Jordan is the daughter to a billionaire who made his fortune through computers (think Steve Jobs). They believe Jordan will help them because of her twin brother, who’s in prison.

Jordan may have a rich father, but she’s financially independent. She’s a business woman in her own right as the owner of DeVine Cellers, where she sells wine. When Huxley and Nick come to her with a proposition where they will release her brother Kyle from prison if she helps, she accepts. She’ll have to play that part of Huxley’s date. Jordan adores Kyle and wants him out of prison. This happened just because he shut down Twitter for two days. Kyle, the so-called, “Twitter Terrorist” and Sawyer look alike from the TV show Lost now sits in jail because of his actions. Jordan will do whatever she can to help him get freed, although she isn’t took keen on Agent McCall. He rubs her the wrong way, assuming she’s some spoiled rich girl.

Things don’t go according to plan because Huxley gets very ill the night of the charity event. Now Nick has to be her date and make it believable that she and Jordan are dating. Everything should still work out, but what Jordan never realized, and suddenly finds out, is that Eckhart wants her, not only for her wine expertise, but her body, as well as her fortune. Now she and Nick have to keep up their fake relationship until Eckhart is arrested. Not only does that place Jordan in a dangerous situation, but she finds herself attractive to the gruff Nick, who has no idea about wine and the total opposite of the men she’s always been interested in. A heated kiss on her front steps starts the ball rolling where their acting becomes a reality.

A Lot Like Love is full of so much win. I can’t find anything wrong with this book at all. It has everything I could want as a reader. This is a smart, mature, fun book with some suspense and marvelous sexual chemistry between Nick and Jordan. Talk about a great couple who steam up the pages! Julie has a great way of building up the tension between these two where the payoff is well worth it. At one point Nick’s jealousy comes out in the open where he wants to claim Jordan. Making out against a wall surrounded by wine is my idea of fun, not counting a bathtub scene that had me nearly swooning.

The dialogue between the characters is top notch. There are more than a few laughs, especially as Nick lusts over Jordan. My favorite scene is where he picks up Jordan for the charity event and his eyes pop out over her dress. He finds out she’s not wearing a bra, just Band-Aids over her nipples. His internal reaction is priceless:

"Don’t think about her nipples. Don’t think about her nipples. He was thinking about her nipples."

Julie has a great way of showing off her secondary characters as well. Kyle is a real hoot. He’s a dorky, loveable computer geek, who looks much like Sawyer, played by the hot actor, Josh Holloway.

Hello, I'm hot with my scruff.

How can you not get behind that? I was also very interested in Xander, the suave, seductive villain. I couldn’t get enough of him and envisioned him being played by the actor, Julian McMahon.

Hai, I'm hot also.

A Lot Like Love reads much like a screenplay, and one if it did get made into a film, I’d love to see. Perhaps Reece Witherspoon would be perfect as Jordan and Clive Owen as Nick?

This is a book I had such a blast reading. Not only did I crave wine while I read, but as soon as I finished reading, I was craving for more from Julie. A Lot Like Love is the first book of the year that I can say will be in my top ten favorite reads for 2011, and one I whole heartedly recommend you pick up. (Berkley)

*I raise a glass of Pinot Noir to the talented Julie James*

Final Grade: A

A few other A Lot Like Love reviews:
Book Smugglers
Night Owl Reviews
Smexybooks

WTF Or Not? You Decide

Warning... some of the WTFckery posted here may make you go Grrr....

1. There are many out there that deserve the WTFckery award this week. Shall we start with HarperCollins?  From Literary Sluts:

"It was announced that HarperCollins has put new restrictions on the eBooks it sells/licenses to libraries through Overdrive. I will link to the articles and blog posts at the end, but the long and short of it is that each eBook will only be able to be lent 26 times and then it will expire and the library or consortium will have to buy/license a new copy. HarperCollins came to the limit of 26 checkouts in part by considering the “the average lifespan of a print book, and wear and tear on circulating copies”.

Thanks HarperCollins for giving the big old finger to libraries and taking even more money to line your pockets. What's next? Taking back actually print copies and having libraries by them back from you after it's been taking out after a certain amount of times you feel is enough?

2. And the never ending drama of whitewashing continues. This concerns casting Katniss in the Hunger Games movies. I first saw this at What If Books Etc that led me to Nevermore999's Livejournal.:

"The protagonist, Katniss Everdeen, is described as having grey eyes, olive skin, and dark hair. What's more, this seems to be a characteristics endemic to the place she lives, shared by her best friend and nearly everyone in her community, making it extremely likely it is a racial characteristic. In fact, it is a made a point of that Katniss's family is mixed, her father of darker complexion and her mother (being more affluent) is lighter, and her sister inherited her mother's looks.

"The casting call for the Hunger Games came out recently. Did it ask for someone dark haired, or olive skinned? No. It did, however, specify Caucasian.

* 15 to 20 years old
* Caucasian
* “underfed but strong” - WTF?!?
* “naturally pretty underneath her tomboyishness”

At the very least, Katniss's role should be open ethnicity. Barring talented PoC women from the role is inexcusable."

Nevermore goes on to say what does Suzanne Collins think of this since she is heavily involved in the movie? Also the part where they want and underfed actress is a true WTFckery IMO, let alone wanting a Causaian actress when the character of Katniss is described as the complete opposite.

Look at what happened with the movie The Last Airbender with the large amount of whitewashing there and it bombed. Take note Lionsgate.

3. And the WTFckery award of the year goes to Charlie Sheen. Thank Charlie for pissing off the guy who gave you a job and cancelled your show for this season, and most likely forever. Those 100 + people now out of work who didn't make close to $2 million and episode are going to do so much more than egg your house. From the NY Times:

"The two companies decided on Thursday to halt production of the hit CBS comedy “Two and a Half Men” after Mr. Sheen, the star of the show, unleashed a barrage of vituperative comments about the sitcom’s creator, Chuck Lorre.

The loss of next season’s episodes would mean forgoing about $250 million in revenue between Warner Brothers, which produces the show, and CBS. The actual shortfall would be much lower because the network would reduce its costs and would receive revenue from another show in its place.

But it would still hurt the bottom line. In halting work on one of television’s most successful programs, network executives were fully aware of the financial implications.

“We knew this was going to cost a ton of money,” one senior executive involved in the decisions said, adding, “tens of millions.”

Based on what the program was expected to take in from syndication sales of future episodes, Warner Brothers could fall short by about $100 million in revenue if the show never tapes another episode."

And Sheen wants to sell his memoirs based on what has happened for the low price of $10 million dollars. I really wond't be surprised if some publisher decides to publish his book and give him the 10 mil as well.

4. I can never get enough the the cover WTFckery out there...

Nobody is going to be chasing this dude that looks like he may have a bad type of leopard STD.

Do I even have to leave a snarky comment for this one? My red blankie, tis pretty and makes me feel so warm. *does anyone think the bat is ready to poop on his head?*

5. Do people really have such a love of breast milk that they would pay $22 for ice cream made from the milk of a breast?  From Gizmodo:

"If the thought of mother's milk appeals to you, you can hotfoot it to the Icecreamists parlor in London's Covent Garden, which is selling the Baby Gaga bowl of icecream for £14 ($22). Each donor is being paid £15 ($24) for every ten ounces of milk extracted using breast pumps—which a mother friend of mine told me would take an hour to pump."

6. I'm not surprised by this because I've heard of people trying to shoplift chainsaws before by putting them down their pants. Is that a chainsaw in your pocket... From The Consumerist:

"An Oklahoma man allegedly chose a novel method: stuffing it down his shorts. The effect was not subtle. A store employee told reporters, "I seen the bar between his legs. It was pretty obvious. Imagine it in the front of your pants."

The perpetrator then left the chainsaw behind and dove headfirst into a nearby waterway, where he was apprehended and arrested."

7. Oh my, I may never think of Pinnocchio the same way again.

8. You know you want your own goggle umbrella. From Gizmodo: 2 umbrellas cost $44.

9. Placing your Gumby and Pokey doll and putting them in scandalous sexual positions is a WTFckery for some, but really funny, don't you think? I wonder if this can be the cover for my next book? I blame Carolyn Crane for my new disturbing obsession with Gumby.

10. You got to love You Tube for some vintage videos. This is from 1987 when former NFL player, Phil Simms tries to channel his inner Jane Fonda and create some LOL hilarious work out videos. That's some mustache Todd Christensen has. And don't get me started on the short shorts...



11. And your Regretsy WTFckery is a real mouthfull.

Enjoy this week's WTFckery!

Does There Come a Time when the Author Who Still Reviews Should be Muzzled?

I’m about to bring up a topic that will most likely have varying opinions. It’s regarding authors who review or rather bloggers turned authors who still review. As you all know, I’m one of them. I’m straddling both sides of the fence, trying to keep a happy medium. There are a few like me who are doing this. In my case, many will mention my author name- KT Grant, but also my on-line blogging handle- Katiebabs. I’ve become KT Grant/Katiebabs. I also have a few multiple personalities on-line. When I channel myself as KT Grant, I do try to act more professional. As Katiebabs I’m a bit loopy, fun loving and outspoken. I also take on another role as Mho Fho for giggles.

Lately there has been much discussion on whether an author who is still a book review blogger should still review an author’s work or be vocal about it on other forums book. Now I’m not talking about big name authors who seem to be exempt from this rule. It’s open season regarding them- James Patterson, Stephenie Meyer, JK Rowling, Stephen King, etc… because regardless if you hate their books with a passion and are vocal about it, they’re bound to sell a ton of books because they have reached the heights of literary greatness. What I’m talking about is reviewing a fellow colleague’s book, say an author in the genre you write for, a mid-list author, a debt author or perhaps an epublished author. Talking about a colleague’s book is great, because you’re getting their name out there. But what if you’ve read a book from them and you didn’t like it? Do you admit that you didn’t and explain why in a review, knowing there may be some backlash in regards to this? “Burning bridges” is mentioned along with if, you send your manuscript to an agent, and that same agent has an author as a client, where you bashed their work in public, they may pass on your book because of it. Or if you’re a newbie author who still reviews, and posts honest reviews and you need an author blurb, what do you do if you want a blurb from an author, whose book you admitted was horrible?

I’ve been thinking about this long and hard. I’ve always been proud that I’m honest and feel that when I post a review here, I try my best to give an unbiased opinion and remain professional as much as I can. I always try to post the pros and cons for each book I review, even those books that I may have not liked. I don’t think I need to muzzle myself yet, but I have taken into consideration about the books I decide to review. I’ll be honest, if I read a debut author’s book and don’t like it, I will either not review it or perhaps try to be kinder in my review, unless something in the book really angered or frustrated me. I also find if I’m friendly with some authors, I take into consideration that what I may say on here could hurt them and ruin our relationship.

Last week, Jenre, who has the blog, Well Read, asked if reviewers should be friends with authors? In her post she brings up how she is close with a few authors who write for the M/M genre (Jenre mainly reviews M/M romance). One section of her post really touched home for me:

“One very popular author sent me their books regularly for review but stopped abruptly when I gave a lukewarm review to one of them - not a bad review, just one which didn't gush and fawn over the book because there were some things in the book that I didn't think worked too well. Up to that point I had had a friendly relationship with this author, had exchanged emails regularly and counted them as a couple of steps up from acquaintance and into friendship. Obviously I was kidding myself because this author has not emailed me since that review, nor sent me any more books and have even removed me from their Good Reads friends list. They joined Twitter not so long ago and 'followed' nearly all my twitter friends. Except me.”

Like Jenre, I’m close with some of authors who send me their work to review. Every time they do this, I sweat because I’m so afraid that I may not like what I read. The question then is whether or not I should review their work. And if I review their work and give it a less than stellar review, would they blackball me from their lives? Well, it has happened to me, much like it has happened to Jenre. There has been a few times where I became friendly with authors over the past few years, where we exchanged emails back and forth, joke around, etc… but then at one point those emails stopped. A few joined Twitter and didn’t follow me there, or if I leave them a tweet, it has been ignored. I’ve gone to a few conferences where the authors I think I’m cool with since we have a great on-line relationship, act very different when we meet in person. I then think, did I say something to make them simply smile, say hello and leave it at that and not talk to me for the rest of the time?

Obsessing about this and why someone may stop emailing me or when they meet me and then turn away, never to speak to me again is really not healthy, because honestly, I have so many other more important things going on in my life. Those people, who I once have been friendly with and now ignore me in person or on-line seems really silly when it comes to the bigger picture.

Now as an author I try not to obsess too much about such important things as the amount of sales I’ll have in one month or reviews. I think I have a good head on my shoulders when it comes to bad reviews because the amount of years I’ve been reviewing and still as reviewer myself.

One such obsession an author may have, or so it seems to me, are blurbs from authors. I’d love to see a scientific poll done where it’s proven that a reader will pick up a book based on an author blurb. I have never bought a book based on an author’s blurb on a book. The reason I pick books to read is because of the appealing cover (I admit I’m shallow like that) and a well written synopsis that grabs my attention.
I don’t put much stock in author blurbs. I was so very confused by a YA book I read that has a blurb from a non-fiction author who also reviews books on their blog and never has reviewed a YA that I can think of. Why would she blurb a Paranormal YA book then? The same case is a blurb from a very popular paranormal romance author on a contemporary romance book. Why would a paranormal romance author blurb for an entirely different genre? If your fan base is full of paranormal fans, what’s the likelihood they will read this contemporary romance just because the paranormal romance author blurbed it?

Author blurbs are a funny thing. And this was even brought more into the light by Becca Fitzpatrick, who wrote the very popular YA book- Hush, Hush. She posted on Goodreads about her experience with giving a blurb to a soon-to-be published author who:

“didn't limit her somewhat rantish reviews to HUSH, HUSH. She'd made quite a habit of belittling authors' books along the way, and I suppose it comes to no surprise that, as far as I know, she was never able to find an author to blurb her book. This isn't to say an aspiring author can't be honest when writing reviews, but if your goal is to be published, it might serve you well to drop the books you don't love, and talk up the ones you do. You don't have to love every book, every time. But I think a bit of courtesy in saying, “This wasn't for me, and here's why,” says volumes about you as a reviewer and a person. No one wants to start their career surrounded by nothing but a lot of burned bridges.”

Becca does have a valid point because the publishing industry is very small and at one point you may meet those authors that you may have stated in a public forum that their book didn’t work for you. Will you have burned a bridge? Most likely, but then again if you are looking for a blurb, why would you want a blurb from an author’s book you may have not liked? I reviewed Hush, Hush, counted it as my worst read of 2009 and would never, ever recommend it to any readers that I know. So if and when I publish a YA, I sure as won’t want Becca to blurb my book, and I wouldn’t expect her to. Why would I want a blurb from an author whose work I don’t like? That would be undermining my own work, wouldn’t it?

Reviewing as both an author and as a blogger has a cause and an effect. Those bridges I may have burned because of my outspokenness is something I have to live with. I either reflect about it until my head hurts or move and continuing doing what I’m doing. As long as I’m not ashamed by what I have said, and can live with the aftermath of my opinions and words, then I can continuing doing what I do best- Writing and being proud of those accomplishments whether it’s well received or not.

A Light at Winter’s End by Julia London Book Giveaway

I really enjoy Julia London's contemporary romances. She really does write wonderful small town romances. Now you can have your chance as well.

I have 3 copies to give away of A Light at Winter's End. (Cedar Springs #3)

Synopsis: Holly Fisher opens her door one day and finds her estranged sister Hannah standing there with a glassy look and her nine-month old baby on her hip. Before Holly knows what is happening, Hannah has left her baby with Holly and disappeared. Three months later, fresh out of rehab for addiction to painkillers, Hannah shows up sober, contrite, and wanting her son back. But Holly is in love with the baby and not willing to give him up to the mother who abandoned him.

Into the middle of this extraordinary conflict between two sisters walks a lonesome cowboy, Wyatt Clark (Summer of Two Wishes) who knows a thing or two about childcare and fractured families. He’s had his own troubles and has stayed away from women the last couple of years, but he can’t resist Holly and the baby. But when Holly is delivered a devastating blow and returns the baby to his mother, Holly is too distraught to continue her relationship with Wyatt. It will take an extraordinary turn from Hannah to bring Holly and Wyatt together so that they both may find the happiness that has eluded them.

For those who read the first book in this series, Summer of Two Wishes, (click here to read review) Wyatt was a main character who lost so much in that book. I've been waiting for his own story, where he finally gets his HEA.

For your chance to win, just leave a comment here by Wednesday, March 2nd. This is only open to US residents and no PO boxes please.

His Client Book Review *Ava March*

Jasper has been working at Madame Delacroix’s brothel where he has been catering to men for a decade. Most of these men are fat and bloated and ones Jasper hates servicing. But her has made a good living off of being a prostitute and has a nice, tidy savings to help him retire to the country even though he’s not even thirty. He has one client he enjoys being with–Nathaniel Travers, who always asks for Jasper whenever he visits the brothel. Nathaniel has been a client of Jasper’s for five years. He thinks of Nathaniel, not only as a lover, but also as a friend. He keeps his feelings hidden from Nathaniel, but is more than happy to act on Nathaniel’s secret desires, even dressing in chemises and black leather corsets as they engage in their sexual and at times kinky fun.

Nathaniel is bereft over the impending marriage of his best friend, Peter Edmonton. Nathaniel has been in love with Peter since they were adolescents and from an experience in school with Pete, Nathaniel assumed Peter would want to be lovers with him. But Peter prefers women and acts as if their sexual experience never happened. He wishes he could tell Peter how he feels, but is afraid Peter will turn away from him in disgust. To vent his frustrations, Nathaniel engages in pugilism and sees Jasper every chance he can get. With Jasper, he can lose himself in his arms without the fear of discovery. Jasper always gives him what he wants and much more.

Jasper can no longer be around Nathaniel knowing the man he can’t stop thinking about longs for another while with him. He makes the final decision to turn his back on Nathaniel and the life he has built for himself. But will Nathaniel let him go or finally face the truth that he’s more than just a client to Jasper who has fallen desperately in love with him?

Ava March’s His Client is a wonderful Gay historical romance about two men who are perfect for one another, but because of their difference in rank and situation, they both yearn for things they think they can never attain. The moment Jasper appears, you get a great sense of his personal angst and how things have become very personal for him regarding Nathaniel. He sacrifices so much, and not just with his body, but accepting Nathaniel for all he is without asking for anything in return.

Nathaniel is also a character you will sympathize with. Every thought and opinion about himself, his fears about being found out by his best friend he adores, as well as society is very realistic. He is totally oblivious to Jasper’s pain because Jasper keeps it hidden so well.

The sex scenes are tastefully done and borderline erotic. Both Jasper and Nathaniel have great chemistry together and Ava turns things up a notch with some subtle kink between the two in the form of light cross-dressing from Jasper. Those love scenes really delivered and cemented a deep emotional response from both men. And if you wonder how in the world these two men can be together, Ava really writes a HEA that you can believe in.

Ava can not only write lush, historical romance, but has an excellent skill at writing Gay romance in a very unique way. Those readers who are in the mood for a different type of historical romance with hot sex between two well-rounded male characters should definitely get their hands on His Client. (Available at Loose-Id)

Final Grade: B+

A few other His Client reviews:
Fiction Vixen
Smexybooks

Confrontation at the Gym Part 2: I’m not waiting for THE ONE

KB has anger...

Remember a few weeks ago I told you about the guy at the gym who said I wasn’t a real author because I write crap? Well, I had another type of confrontation that wasn’t really heated, but the conversation irked me. It may have been because I was cranky because I was at the gym at 6am and my eyes were barely open, dying inside to go back to bed.

The story goes as follows…

I’m waiting for the exercise instructor to come and start the class. Now if the instructor doesn’t come on time and starts the class late, I tend to becomes even crankier than I already am due to less than 8 hours of sleep and being up at the crack of dawn. This woman I’ve seen at the gym, and have chatted with time to time, sits down and talks to me. She very awake and energetic because she’s been up since 4:30am and revved to go. I, on the other hand, literally rolled out of bed, threw on my workout clothes and drove the 10 minute drive to the gym. Peppy woman tells me how she just got married for a second time and how she loves it and is so very happy, especially after her first marriage didn’t work out. She goes on to say how she and her new husband are trying to come to terms with one another in their living space because before they were married they didn’t live together. She goes on to explain her issues with her hubby keeping the television on in the bedroom while she tries to go to sleep. She says I must know how it feels. I tell her I don’t know how it feels because I’m not married.

Peppy woman: Oh, you’re not married? Why you’re still young (everyone assumes I’m 10 years younger than I am), so that’s okay. How old are you by the way?
Me: 34. I have never been married nor have any desire to.
Peppy Woman: You will. You still just haven’t met the right man, THE ONE yet.
Me: Nope. Don’t want to be married and never will.
Peppy Woman: *Looks on in shock and rolls her eyes* When you want to have kids, you’ll get married.
Me: I’m not meant to have kids. I’m fine with my cats.

Peppy Woman sits there trying to think of the next thing to say. I just admitted I’m fine with having cats for comfort and don’t need a man. I blame my reasoning on lack of sleep. Finally the exercise instructor comes in. Here I think I’m saved from this very uncomfortable conversation because yet again here’s another person who believes that all women in their 30’s want to get married and have children. Before Peppy Woman leaves, she pats me on the knee and says, “Don’t worry, you’ll change your mind once HE walks into your life.”

There are two things that really upset me when people, especially strangers make assumptions when it comes to me. First their comments on what I eat and what I look like really makes me grrr. Don’t get me started on this past weekend as I was food shopping and comparing fat and the amount of calories on the back of boxes when this older gentleman out of the blue tells me that I need to stop doing that because my weight is fine, that it’s silly for me to be so concerned about my calorie intake because of the way I look. He happened to then make snide comments in his playful way, even though he did comes across as a jerk every time he saw me in the aisle as I compared packages to one another. I really had to hold back and tell him to mind his own business. Yes, I have food issues still because as a former woman who was 80 pounds overweight, I have to do this so I don’t balloon back up to my former size. But of course how would he know this without me telling him? I let that drop, and put down the box of 2 for $5 brownies I was dying to make and consume. (Brownies are the devil. I seriously could eat a whole plate in one sitting)

I guess the same rules apply for the Peppy Woman at the gym, but I love how there’s an assumption. Because I’m in my mid-thirties, I must have been married, want to get married at one point, want to have children and will most likely get married because of it. Even after I very strongly told her I don’t want any of the above, she blew it off because she thinks I haven’t met THE ONE.

This really shouldn’t come as a big surprise, because since I’ve been a teenager I would get such questions as- “are you dating?” “do you have a boyfriend?” “why don’t you date?” “How can it be you’ve never been in a long term relationship?”

I’ve never been in a long term relationship (I blame my abundant size through most of my teens and my early 20’s where the damage and my low self-esteem has stuck with me into my thirties), my dating experiences would be perfect for a sitcom, and I have no desire, even when and if I meet THE ONE to marry them and have their offspring.

I’ve been single most of my life, and you know what? I love it. Does a single woman or single man really need to be with someone to be complete and whole? Was my reaction to Peppy Woman at the gym silly?

And even if I did meet THE ONE (I don’t really think I could tell if he is the one because I don’t think I’d hear bells, whistles or hearts would appear over head) how would I know if my life was now so very complete with THE ONE in it?

Single peeps, help me out here. Are you fine with your single status or are you still waiting for THE ONE?

Have You Always Wondered... *Book WTFckery*

Why your cat may paint better than you do? I ponder this almost everyday when my two cats take time out of their day (to nap, poop, eat, play, destroy things off my bedroom dresser) to paint their next masterpiece.

This is too good to wait for my weekly WTFckery post.

From Awful Library Books:

Yes, it is a real book. No joke.

Why Cats Paint: A Theory of Feline Aesthetics by Heather Busch, Burton Silver.

Synopsis: In 1994, WHY CATS PAINT took the art world and animal world by storm with its unprecedented photographic record of cat creativity. This seminal book in feline aesthetics is now offered in a new pocket-size edition, making it a purrfect gift for cat lovers and art lovers alike.

You think my cat art sucks? I will claw you to death!

 (From now on when I have a KB rant post, this is the picture I'll show to denote my rage)

If not for Julie at Yummy Men, Kick Ass Chicks, I'd never know about Awful Library Books.

This Side of the Grave Book Review *Jeaniene Frost*

This Side of the Grave is book #5 in Jeaniene’s Frost’s Night Huntress Series about the half-breed human/vampire redheaded Cat Crawford and her vampire husband Bones. These two are happily married, although the poor duo never has a down moment. Now there’s a war brewing between the vampires and the ghouls. They have to take down Apollynon, a centuries old ghoul, who’d love to eliminate Cat and Bones from the equation permanently. Not only is Cat called back into to action again, but she’s having some nasty side effects from Bones’s blood she drinks. Because of that, her senses are heightened so much so that she can hear people’s thoughts. She also has a new awesome power she can’t control; especially during those times she doesn’t have any control over her emotions.
Cat tends to get into many scrapes, but knows how to handle herself in battle. She has accrued a great team as backup with some of the most powerful vampires in existence such as mega-vampire Mencheres, who is a type of grandfather figure to Bones (trust me, he’s not decrepit in any way and looks like the actor, Oded Fehr) and Vlad, who’s very snarky to Cat, can shoot fire out of his hands and is better known as the most acknowledge d vampire ever- Dracula. Cat has a love/hate relationship with Vlad, but he’s a very powerful ally, so she has to play nice. Then there’s her Uncle Don, who not only gave her a new lease on life, but also caused her a great deal of grief. Don is dying and Cat has to deal with the repercussions of his death.

This Side of the Grave is more of a day in the life telling of Cat. It’s a never ending cycle with her constantly on her toes and navigating the vampire world she feels she doesn’t really fit into. She has a choice to become a full-fledged vampire, but Bones isn’t too keen on the idea. Cat is very strong has a half-vamp. Can you imagine what she’d be like as a full one?

There’s a lot of great on-liners this time around, mainly from Cat and Vlad. The scene where Cat and Bones are at the mall and Cat grumbles that the female buyers are eye-humping him gave me a good laugh. Also Vlad’s view of himself is very cocky, but adorable. When I first met Vlad, he didn’t make a good first impression, but now I can’t wait for him to be the star of his own book, which looks like it’s a go. It will be great to see him matched up with a woman who can take him down a notch.

The best thing about this series is the relationship between Cat and Bones. It’s always refreshing to see a married couple so in love and passionate about each other. For those who read these books, you all know about the amazing erotic Chapter 32 that’s now synonymous with Jeaniene’s name. Well, Jeaniene has done it again with Chapter 21, starting on page 199, (yes, I marked the page number down) where Cat and Bones have more bedroom fun together. Candles and wax are involved ala the movie Body of Evidence. It’s a bit kinky, and at one point I cringed because of where the wax ended up on Bones, but woo wee, it’s quite the humdinger of hotness. I ended up re-reading that chapter three times, back-to-back, because it was that good.

This Side of the Grave is had pretty solid reading with engaging characters. I count Jeaniene Frost as one of my comfort reads I can always look forward to. If you’re looking for a new paranormal vampire series, where the vampires don’t sparkle, as Bones points out in this book, I’d definitely say read Jeaniene Frost and introduce yourself to Cat Crawford, vampire fighter extraordinaire. (Avon)

Final Grade: B+

A few other This Side of the Grave reviews:
A Bookworm's Haven
Joyfully Reviewed
Yummy Men and Kick Ass Chicks

KB Pimpin' Future Releases

Dangerous in Diamonds (The Rarest Blooms #4) by Madeline Hunter coming from Jove on April 26th.

Synopsis: The Duke of Castleford has been so bad for so long that scandal can’t be bothered to rise up around him anymore. To alleviate the boredom of his privileged life, he occupies himself with drinking and whoring, not to mention the occasional duel. When something piques his interest, however, he has been known to emerge from his ennui and employ his considerable mental faculties to finding answers to the questions that fascinate him.

When Daphne Joyes rejects this notorious hedonist’s seduction, she assumes that he will forget about her and continue on his path to hell. Instead her beauty, grace and formidable composure captivate him, and she becomes one of those fascinations to him. That he intends to have her, and soon, is actually the least of the dangers that his pursuit of her presents. More troublesome is his interest in her past and her history, and the way he keeps poking his nose into the secrets behind the distant relative’s bequest that gave him ownership of the property where she lives

The blurb has sold me on this one. The Legend of Michael (Zodius #1) by Lisa Renee Jones coming from Sourcebooks on May 1st. Perhaps the hero is a virgin? *bouncy*

Synopsis: One of an army of human soldiers injected with alien DNA, Michael is a legend within this new race, split between good and evil. Untamable, he has walked on the dark side and returned to the light. Feared and misunderstood, he leaves everything behind, including the one woman destined to be his mate.

Fate leads Michael back to Cassandra Powell, for she holds the key to defending his comrades. With their loyalties divided between duty and the people they love, only together can Cassandra and Michael overcome insurmountable odds to save humanity from the wrath of a madman.

But no ordinary woman can control a creature such as Michael, and only one thing is clear—the world will never be the same…

The buzz surrounding this one is that it's Twilight, but with zombies. Die for Me (Revenants #1) by Amy Plum coming from ATOM on May 5th.

Synopsis: “When Kate Mercier’s parents die in a tragic car accident, she leaves her life—and memories—behind to live with her grandparents in Paris. For Kate, the only way to survive her pain is escaping into the world of books and Parisian art. Until she meets Vincent.

Mysterious, charming, and devastatingly handsome, Vincent threatens to melt the ice around Kate’s guarded heart with just his smile. As she begins to fall in love with Vincent, Kate discovers that he’s a revenant—an undead being whose fate forces him to sacrifice himself over and over again to save the lives of others. Vincent and those like him are bound in a centuries-old war against a group of evil revenants who exist only to murder and betray. Kate soon realizes that if she follows her heart, she may never be safe again.

Sexy sounding book here. The Harlot by Saskia Walker coming from Spice on May 24th.

Synopsis: It is a Dark Era, one when a lusty lass will do what she must to survive. Even if it means bartering flesh for a palmful of coins…

Forced to watch her mother burned at the stake and separated from her siblings in the aftermath, Jessie Taskill is similarly gifted, ripe with a powerful magic that must stay hidden. Until one night when she's accused by a rival, and Jessie finds herself behind prison walls with a roguish priest unlike any man of the cloth she has known.

In reality, Gregor Ramsay is as far from holy as the devil himself, but his promise of freedom in return for her services may be her salvation. Locked into a dubious agreement, Jessie resents his plan to have her seduce and ruin his lifelong enemy. But toying with Gregor’s lust for her is enjoyable, and she agrees to be his pawn while secretly intending to use him just as he is using her.

One Night Scandal by Christie Kelley coming from Zebra on June 1st.

Synopsis: Born on the wrong side of the blanket, matchmaker Sophie Reynard understands the consequences of unbridled desire all too well. Despite the many highborn friends she has matched, falling in love with an aristocrat without a pedigree of her own would be an act of futility. But that doesn't stop her from succumbing to one evening of anonymous passion. . .

Nicholas Tenbury, Marquess of Ancroft, knows nothing of Sophie's lineage. He knows only that the enchanting beauty captured his heart in one night and then fled, leaving no trace of her identity. But when he seeks answers from London's finest matchmaker, he finds none other than the woman herself—stubbornly refusing to acknowledge the attraction they share! Now the enamored Marquess has no choice but to sway Sophie with seduction. . .

Not sure what to think about this cover. My Life as A White Trash Zombie (White Trash Zombie #1) by Diana Rowland coming from DAW on July 5th.

Synopsis: Angel Crawford is a loser

Living with her alcoholic deadbeat dad in the swamps of southern Louisiana, she's a high school dropout with a pill habit and a criminal record who's been fired from more crap jobs than she can count. Now on probation for a felony, it seems that Angel will never pull herself out of the downward spiral her life has taken.

That is, until the day she wakes up in the ER after overdosing on painkillers. Angel remembers being in an horrible car crash, but she doesn't have a mark on her. To add to the weirdness, she receives an anonymous letter telling her there's a job waiting for her at the parish morgue--and that it's an offer she doesn't dare refuse.

Before she knows it she's dealing with a huge crush on a certain hunky deputy and a brand new addiction: an overpowering craving for brains. Plus, her morgue is filling up with the victims of a serial killer who decapitates his prey--just when she's hungriest!

Angel's going to have to grow up fast if she wants to keep this job and stay in one piece. Because if she doesn't, she's dead meat.

Literally.

How awesome that the heroine wants to be a romance author! Love Story by Jennifer Echols coming from MTV Books on July 19th.

Synopsis: Erin Blackwell is headed to college in New York City to study creative writing and earn a living as a romance novelist. Her grandmother has other plans: she approves of the college, but she wants Erin to major in business and then come back home to Kentucky to run the family’s famous racehorse farm. There is no way Erin will agree. Studying in New York and writing her way into a career is her escape from the farm and the family tragedy that happened there. So Erin’s grandmother decides Erin really will live life as a starving artist. She takes Erin’s future job running the farm, her inheritance, even her college tuition, and gives them all to Hunter Allen.

Hunter has lived on the farm for years. He’s Erin’s age, he’s the stable boy, and he’s the romantic dream of every girl in her high school. But he was involved in the family tragedy. Erin has always given him a wide berth. And he’s a slick opportunist. She’s furious that he fooled her grandmother into giving him Erin’s birthright and sending him to Erin’s college.

At least she’s free of him in her creative writing class. So she pens a story that has haunted her lately, in which the horse farm heiress at the very first Kentucky Derby starts a forbidden affair with the lowly stable boy. Unfortunately for her, the day she’s sharing this story with her New York classmates, Hunter walks in. He’s switching to her class. And after reading about himself in Erin’s story, he writes his own sexy assignments that lure Erin into dangerous fantasies about what could have been between them, and what might b

This looks like another unbelievably hot historical from Victoria Dahl. It's Always Been You (York Family #2) coming from Zebra on August 2nd.

Side note: Doesn't Victoria's cover also look much like one of Kathryn Smith's?

Synopsis: Aidan York has spent ten years mourning the woman he once loved and lost. He’s filled the void in the only way he knows - by distracting himself with wild behavior and scandalous trysts. It’s a hollow existence, but it dulls the pain. Until the day he encounters a ghost: the woman he thought drowned at sea, alive and as enchanting as ever…

When Kate Hamilton sees the man she once hoped to spend her life with, she is hit with a storm of memories and longing. But though resisting Aidan’s passion proves impossible, Kate must try not to love him all over again. For her seemingly quiet London life shields a dangerous secret, one that will catch up to her the moment she lets herself fall.

The Lost (Sin Hunters #1) by Caridad Piñeiro coming from Forever on August 2nd.

Synopsis: Adam Salvatore is no ordinary millionaire. The heir to an ancient race possessing a dark, powerful magic, he can shapeshift and create energy. His gifts make him a living weapon and have forced him to live in seclusion. But now an inhuman force hunts down Adam-just when he finds someone who makes him feel more human than he ever imagined possible . . .

Home from combat in Iraq, Bobbie Carerra wants only peace, yet soon joins Adam in a terrifying battle against paranormal enemies who hide in plain sight. She's drawn to his strength of mind and body; he's attracted to her courage and intoxicating energy. Their scorching passion can either transport them to the heights of ecstasy or-if Adam's powers rage out of control-destroy them. But when an invisible brotherhood tightens its nets and someone Adam trusts betrays him, only a heartrending decision can save them.

At first upon viewing the cover, I thought this book was a contemporary. It's a historical. Hm. Seven Years to Sin by Sylvia Day coming from Brava on August 31st.

Synopsis: Seven years ago, on the eve of her wedding, proper Lady Jessica Sheffield witnessed a licentious scene no innocent young miss could imagine. Shocked, yet strangely titillated, she’d held her silence regarding scandalous Alistair Caulfield, and walked down the aisle as expected. But through years of serene, unremarkable marriage, Caulfield’s image remained burned into her imagination, fueling very illicit dreams…

Alistair ran far from the temptation of the prim debutante with the fire of passion in her eyes–all the way to the West Indies. As a successful merchant, he has little in common with the rakehell youth she knew. But when newly widowed Jessica steps aboard his ship for a transatlantic passage, seven years’ worth of denied pleasures are held in check by nothing more than a few layers of silk–and the certainty that surrender will consume them both…

Pleasure Me Advanced Book Review *Monica Burns*

I have a small number of authors I always rely on who give me a well-written, unique story. These authors are either comfort reads or ones who are willing to take a chance and write unconventional characters and story lines. Monica Burns is all of the above. She gives me the comfort I need, while writing excellent romance and with characters who are not the ho-hum, been there, done that I’ve seen countless times before. Her latest release, Pleasure Me has a perfect combination of what I love in romance. We have a semi-alpha type hero who has been scarred from an event in his younger years due to a horrendous relative. Because of that, he feels he’s less than a man and has never been intimate with a woman. The heroine is considered past her prime at 41 years old, a courtesan who should retire and never been seen again. Both Baron Garrick Stratfield and Lady Ruth Attwood are two maturely written characters I had the delight to read about set in a Victorian London, England at the turn of the 19th century.

Virgin alpha hero + older experience heroine in Victorian England = Win!

Ruth has just been tossed aside by Lord Marston, her recent protector, for a much younger woman. At forty-one, Ruth knows her options have become limited. She’s ready to retire as a courtesan, but it pains her to do so. Not because of the pleasure she may receive from a man, but the idea that she’s dried up and lacking in her sexuality because of her age. Ruth has a kind heart, for she volunteers her time at an orphanage. Her goal is to purchase Crawley Hall to make into a new orphanage that the odious Marston had promised to give her. Unfortunately for her there is another interested buyer- Barron Garrick Stratfield.

Garrick wants Crawley Hall for his sister Lily, who also helps the orphans (coincidentally the same ones Ruth is involved with). The moment Garrick sees Ruth at a ball he’s bowled over by her. Her advanced age doesn’t concern him. He wants her as his mistress, but in name only. The reason is Garrick feels he’s has abnormality that makes him less than a man. His uncle who, became his and his siblings’ guardian after his parents death, found out what he has and made a point to ridicule Garrick when he was only seventeen and coming into his sexuality. Because of that event, Garrick has never been sexually active, other than kissing, because he dare not let anyone see him naked. But with Ruth he longs to be with her naked and do everything a man would do with a woman he desires. At first Ruth wants nothing to do with him because he’s too forceful, too young for her, and knows all the gossip about his prowess from other women. She assumes he’ll eventually leave her for another woman, especially since he’ll need to get married and have heirs. And since Ruth is past her prime and because of her reputation, she can never have a future with Garrick.

At first Garrick only offers her friendship. But Garrick has a bad habit of kissing Ruth every change they’re together. Ruth is undone by his skillful kisses. If he can make her almost climax with his lips, she can only just imagine what he’ll be like in the bedroom. And when Ruth invites him to her bed, he has one request- she can never see him naked and must wear a blindfold. Ruth allows this since she wants Garrick badly, but he’s unlike any of her past suitors. Something about Garrick if off. He’s more than willing to offer her pleasure, but not receive anything in return. And when she finds out what Garrick is hiding and why, she tries her best to get him to trust her, hoping that when they break off, it won’t be too painful. But Garrick isn’t the type to walk away, because now that he has Ruth he’ll never let her leave him.

Passion is the key word here. Monica can write such unbelievable sexual tension. I really can’t find any fault with the way Garrick and Ruth interacted with one another. They have this deep pull toward one another. Garrick ultimately holds back because of his fear and loathing over his body. Ruth’s reason is because of her age. These two may seem to harp on a great deal about their faults, but it’s written in such a way that makes perfect sense why they think the way they do.

I had a few “what if” moments with Garrick. What if he’d only gone to a doctor at a younger age to discuss his deformity as he thinks it to be (to announce what it is would take away from the enjoyment of the story)? But if he had, then the story would be very different from the way Monica has envisioned it. Garrick is the type to keep things closely guarded, and for a man of that time to be open and honest, even with his physician, may have caused more psychological damage. Because of that, Garrick puts on an amazing front, a self-assured man who will not be messed with, even as his enemies accuse him of being a sodomite because he’s not a braggart when it comes to his sexual conquests. It’s very telling how male society views themselves when it comes to the number of women they have conquered. Monica gives a great psychological study, as well as a woman’s status and respect among her counterparts with Ruth.

Pleasure Me is Monica’s best book to date. It’s mature and smart reading that doesn’t get better than this. I really had high hopes for Pleasure Me when I first heard about it. If there's a virgin hero, and one who’s younger than the heroine, you have me on board to read. Monica has sold me hook, line and sinker. Those who are bored with historical romance because it’s the same old stereotypical trite stories, Pleasure Me is perfect in taking away those blah feelings. I’m giving you another call to action to buy. Pleasure Me as a fabulous read and one of the best books released for this spring season. (Available March 1st, Berkley)

Final Grade: A-

Other Pleasure Me reviews:
Bodice Ripper Novels
Book-Addicts
Geeky Blogger's Book Review

WTF Or Not? You Decide

Here comes the LOL WTFckery...

1. Ye goode WTF book covers...

A little bovine orgyfest?

Has's review says it all: "I knew what I was getting myself into when I picked up the book, in fact I couldn't help myself because this was an erotic retelling tale of Snow White but no dwarves (thank god- to know there is probably 10001 porn movies and who knows what else is out there) which isn't that exactly sexy an image and tarnish my childhood memories thank you very much. But this is the start of Siren's new line of Sextreme line of erotic romances that has more than four ding dongs. And you guessed right in this book there is 7 ding donged heroes, who are all brothers and top that, they are shapeshifting Longhorns. When I read they turned into bulls with long horns - I could not help myself! I mean who can't resist the idea of a cowshifter which is the strangest animal form I have read (well there was the duck-shifter story but that doesn't really count)."

Bear Love?

I had no idea what this cover is? Lumberjack creature of the night?

2. Awesome toy WTFckery thanks to Penny Watson and her obsession with beards. I had no clue Shaving Fun Ken has been around since the 90's.

"Barbie Shaving Fun Ken Doll: Ken has a date with Barbie but also has a five o’clock shadow. Girls can help Ken out by shaving away his facial hair so he will be looking his best for his date with Barbie. Just dip the sponge-tipped razor in warm water and shave Ken doll's beard and dip the towel in cold water to wipe his face and make his facial hair grow back. Includes Ken doll with color-change beard, shaving accessories and a towel."

3. Speaking of beards, I saw this over at Smexybooks and had a good laugh. Beardheads!

"Want to look like a lumberjack but can't? Beardhead to the rescue!"

4. I must be really cheap because my haircuts cost under $30. But not for Justin Bieber who spends $750 a pop on his hair that looks like someone put a bowl on his head and cut around it. From Pop Eater:

"According to Life & Style magazine, the Bieb's 'do costs upward of $750 per haircut. Vanessa Price is the hairstylist who created the teen crooner's signature look in 2009, and she makes housecalls to Bieber to touch up her work.

"I usually cut his hair every couple of weeks when he's on tour," Price said.

If that's the case, the singer dishes out more than $1,500 a month on his hair."

5. This looks so good. Talk about an awesome WTFckery cookie mashup! From Serious Eats:

Oreo Stuffed Chocolate Chip Cookies for the win!

6. I can't even tell you what type of cake this is. Some type of dog creature covered in pollen? From Cakewrecks:

7. Blerg. Bacon flavors toothpaste? From Uncrate:

"Brushing your teeth with a strip of fried bacon is tricky. If it's too crisp it will break apart as you brush and if it's too limp you won't be able to remove any of the plaque. So when it's time to brush your teeth, leave the bacon strips for breakfast and try this Bacon Toothpaste. It's the perfect way to keep your teeth and gums healthy while coating your mouth with the delicious flavor of smoky meat!"

8. Mom sues for Century 21 for not getting her 80 cents. Is that like "I want my two dollars" from Better off Dead? From NY Daily News:

"A coupon-clipping New Jersey mom insists Century 21 short-changed her and is suing the famed department store to recoup a grand total of...80 cents.

Tova Gerson claims in court papers that she used a $5 coupon when she bought more than $100 worth of stuff last month at the chain's Paramus, N.J., store.

When she returned one item a week later, Gerson claims she got back $17.17 instead of the $17.97 she had been expecting because the coupon had been pro-rated over all the goods she purchased.

So she hired a New York lawyer and tried to up the ante by filing a class action lawsuit on Feb. 10 for damages."

9. Whatever could this dog be thinking? From Bits & Pieces:

10. When I think of Snow Shark, I think of the old school SNL skit about the Land Shark who eats the unsuspecting people dumb enough to answer the door. Check out the trailer for what is sure to become a cult classic:

"12 years ago during a scientific expedition 3 animal biologists stumbled upon a great discovery that ended in tragedy. Whatever killed them has awoken and now the legend of the Ancient Snow Beast could prove to be more than just a legend!"

11. And your Regretsy WTFckery is a special type of perfume that one you can bid for on Ebay.  The description for this product is very O.o. (click here to read it because it's just too NSFW and we all know I run a classy place here)

Very Kenneth Cole like. Don't you think?

As always, a big shot out to Chris at Stumbling Over Chaos for her best WTFckery links that I can grab and post here.

I hope you have enjoyed this week's best in WTFckery!