Christmas WTFckery Anyone?

It's a week before Christmas and what better way to countdown as we wait for this holiday than some Christmas WTFckery? Who would have thought that when I started my Sunday WTFckery posts, it would become some of my most popular ones?

This is a little treat for my WTFckery fans out there...

WTF is up with cats wanting to hang out in a Christmas tree?
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Lets us take a moment to listen to a very special Christmas PSA. CBS cares about women getting their pap smears, especially from their boyfriends or husbands. Thanks to JMC for this one.


Forget the Snuggie or the Slanket! The one gift everyone wants to open on Christmas morning is the Necky! Yes, this is an actual product and can be all yours for $9.95 (plus S&H). Who wants the leopard print on? Kind of reminds me of the dickie.


Anyone need a last minute ornament to hang on their tree? What a nicelt hung stocking.

From your friendly Cake Wrecks blog. Tis the season for a special Santa Cake. "Why Santa, your mouth is perfect for someone to stick their ****..."


Enjoy this latest in Christmas WTFckery...

Proof by Seduction Advanced Review *Courtney Milan*

When I began reading Proof by Seduction I wasn’t sure what to make of it. We have our heroine, Jenny Keeble who is a fraud by playing the role of a fortune teller named Madame Esmerelda. She lives in near poverty but because she is skilled at deceit and believes she isn’t a good person and hasn’t been since she turned nine years old, she does what she has to do to survive. Jenny is not some virginal, innocent British miss but a mature woman of thirty. The only respect she gets is from her clients, especially a young idealistic gentleman, Ned Carhart. Jenny enjoys having Ned as her client because he’s such a nice guy and she doesn’t feel lonely, even though she continues to take his money. And she doesn’t really feel that guilty because if he’s that gullible, it’s his own fault. But what Jenny doesn’t know is Ned has a cousin with a very critical mind and when he hears about Madame Esmerelda, he goes with Ned to visit her. The moment Jenny meets Gareth Carhart, Marquess of Blakley she knows her days are numbered.

Gareth is not only cold, distant and very rude, but Jenny also finds herself attracted to him. I think in part it has to do with him being compared to a “tawny, ferocious and a little feral” lion. Jenny is good at reading people and she’s on point when it comes to Gareth. Ned is very protective of the Madame, while Gareth is annoyed. Not only is Ned being played for a fool, but Gareth has been forced away from his busy schedule to handle this situation. He hates having the responsibility of being a father type figure to Ned. Gareth isn’t comfortable with people, even his own family. He’s been away in Brazil for years working on a nature expedition and now only just returned to England when his grandfather died and had to take over the responsibility of his title. He still longs for the freedom and seclusion he sacrificed.

Jenny will not be pushed around by Gareth. Actually, she enjoys the banter with him and wants him to loosen up, to smile and enjoy himself. She comes up with a game of sorts to prove she’s authentic. Jenny is skilled at making things up. She tells Ned the spirits have come to her and stated Gareth will marry a woman at a ball they are going to attend. From an orange Ned cuts up, she sees a vision of an elephant. She predicts Gareth will approach his future bride and give her a carved elephant. Gareth is stuck in a hard position because if he exposes Jenny for what she really is, it will break Ned’s heart. He goes along with the ruse but Jenny will also be involved because if he’s going to be made look like a fool, than Jenny will also.

Jenny and Gareth are complete opposites in every way. Even though life has been less than ideal for Jenny, she finds humor in the world around her. She tries to make the best of her situation. Gareth is so strung tight and can barely function in society or even with his own sister who wants his approval but seems frighten of him. As soon as Jenny walks into Gareth’s life, he changes for the better. He kicks and screams and doesn’t want to change, but Jenny forces him. Unfortunately for Jenny, Gareth is much like a hurricane. Once he has been unleashed, he won’t be controlled. Even though he treats Jenny with contempt, he longs to hold her in his arms, to bring her pleasure and have it returned. And most importantly he wants Jenny to call him by his first name of Gareth because Gareth the man is very different from Gareth the Marquess. Jenny is now playing with fire because she decided to tangle with this lion.

Proof by Seduction is a dance between two people. Gareth and Jenny are spectacular together. When Gareth comes to the conclusion he needs Jenny, that’s when things really pick up. He wants her with a desperate need because she’s able to pick at his emotional scabs until they are oozing. Gareth has cut himself off, all because of a sad and lonely childhood that shaped him into the man he has become. Coincidentally, Jenny’s own childhood is much like Gareth’s. Jenny is willing to give everything to Gareth, even become his lover without the benefits of marriage, but won’t become his mistress where she’ll be bought with an expensive trinket or a nice house in town. She tries to teach Gareth these differences with some interesting results.

The change from disdain to passion and lust Gareth and Jenny have for one another happens quickly and may make the reader do a second take. But the scenes where Gareth invites Jenny to sin with him are incredibly sexy. These are two people who need touch and intimacy to feel alive and because they have been denied it for so long, they latch onto each other. There’s so much meaning behind the reasons Gareth wants Jenny to call him by his first name. There aren’t a whole slew of love making between these two, but they sure make up for it with their kissing and lusty looks. When they finally act on their desire, it sizzles, even though there was one statement that really jolted me out of the story. At one point as Gareth is giving Jenny the much anticipated loving with his tongue, it’s mentioned he enjoyed tasting the salty sweetness of the woman that is Jenny. Sorry, I suddenly have a craving for chocolate covered potato chips for some reason. Even with that small purple prose description, I enjoyed the rest of the passage.

Gareth is one of those wonderful, misunderstood, stubborn heroes you want to hold close to your heart because of his internal suffering. I did feel Gareth held back a bit too much. I wanted to see more of an explosion on his part, an impassioned plea where he finally understands why he’s the way he is and how he would fix it.

Courtney Milan’s debut is a wonderful read. I really loved how Jenny tore off the mask Gareth wears and how they were able to come together and find happiness and love. The ending is sweet, tender and everything in between. Ned also brings forth some lighthearted moments, especially his appreciation for a woman’s ankles and his sudden feelings for the woman he believes is Gareth’s future wife.

Courtney Milan is a very welcomed debut author to the historical romance world and I look forward to her future releases. (HQN)

Final Grade: B+

Chocolate Covered Potato Chips Described Perfectly...

I just finished a really great historical romance from a debut author. The book will be released next month and my review posted this week.

I was in the midst of reading and enjoying a love making scene between the hero and heroine when this line jolted me out of the story:

"He dipped his tongue between her legs, tasting the salty sweetness of woman."

For some reason I started craving chocolate covered pretzels or potato chips.

Is it just me, or is that line a bit too purple prose? Hot line and all, and what comes afterwards is sizzling but I had to put down the cook and raid my kitchen for something sweet/salty.

Ever read a specific line in a book that made you hungry for no reason other than the description?

Author WTFckery at Play: The Sad Case of Candace Sams

By now you probably heard about the big ole bat shit craziness from author Candace Sams on Amazon, who published with Dorchester as well as with some epublishers. I first heard about this from Jane at Dear Author who announced it on Twitter about Sams being more than upset over a one star review concerning her 2008 release, Electra Galaxy’s Mr. Interstellar Feller (Dorchester Love Spell Line) posted on Amazon on November 8, 2009.

Part of me hopes that this is a troll and not the actual Sams, because her reaction and comments she posted in section under the review are a bit out there and a case of major diarrhea of the mouth. Her reaction strikes me as strange for a book that has been released for over a year. The on-going discussion that just won’t quit now has over 230 comments, the most I've ever seen on Amazon review.

Sams goes by Niteflyr One on Amazon.

Here I have highlighted some of my favorite Sams comments so you don’t have to scroll down through all of them. She goes on to say how Harriet Klausner is such a professional and amazing reviewer, how certain publishers and editors she works with *TAKE NOTE DORCHESTER* take control of her work, where an author has no control over the dialogue, language and love scenes, as well as getting in touch with the FBI because she feels she was threatened in the comments:

And there you go readers...it's easy to play the critic...not so easy to take the criticism.

Again...I point to Ms. Klausner as a number one reviewer for Amazon.com. She knows that authors rarely have full editorial control; rarely do they have even 'scant' control over their covers or the language used in dialogue or even sequencing of scenes: love scenes, kissing scenes, scenes of violence, etc. These are ultimately controlled by editorial staff...very rarely the author alone.

*WHOA! This is a big accusation about your publisher who cuts your checks so you can continue to make a living! And how would Harriet know this about authors and editorial control?*

Ms. Klausner is reviewing with the knowledge that a professional reviewer would have. That is to say that she knows the titles are judged in relation to others of their kind, the differences inherent in trying new concepts as well as pacing, world-building, imagination, etc.

Those conversations were, on the whole, fraught with sophomoric comments blaming authors for all kinds of editorial decisions over which they have no or very little control (kissing scenes, cover content, love scenes, language, etc., etc., etc).

This leads me to believe the reviewer in question is somewhat of a frustrated romance author - who could not get his/her own work published - or who cannot write a manuscript at all......there seems, therefore, to be a need to render rather caustic attacks and on those who 'can' write and who 'can' get published.

Posters such as L.B. Taylor may have had the disparaging effect of altering publishing professional's opinions about whether or not to allow a particular author to continue making a living. Now...this hardly effects some would-be reviewers. They post carelessly and without any consequence for their actions. Taylor has done this many, many times to many authors - possibly effecting their ability to engage future publishing contracts. *Authors beware! Reviewers can cause you to lose your publishing contracts because we have such power.*

Taylor, unable to take the same kind of criticism he/she inflicted (which is common for these hit-and-run reviewers) seems to have recruited 'help' to defend him/herself. The true mark of a coward. But, alas, this is the nature of the hit-and-run review beast. I leave it to you - dear readers - to decide whether authors should be allowed to try and make a living...or if reviewers such as Taylor should be allowed to run amok across Amazon deciding who might or might not get another contract for new work. Why not try thinking about the consequences of your actions before roaming the Internet and posting whatever you will, without thinking first? Your actions might keep someone from working...what do you suffer?

For some time now, I've been getting messages from more equitable reviewers, agents and editors that this person (Taylor) was 'known' in the industry for having some very angry, almost hateful opinions (if she ever thought about being an author, she and some of her cohorts can now give that dream up).

Because, that's the way the business works in some New York venues. Only the highest paid authors won't have their manuscripts ripped apart by some editors. As to my bad author behavior...I'm getting a lot of email telling me to stand my ground...from people who ARE buying my books.

Good for her...come back when she's published thirty novels like me and has done business with Dorchester. *Take note in regards to Sams’ comment about losing control over her work*

This is where Sams mentions the FBI: When I was made aware the facts and what happened and how the law reads, I told Amazon.com about the matter - I was on the phone with them very early this morning. They've been sent an email bearing a copy of the message in question. An investigative agency in charge of cyber stalking was also contacted...not by Amazon but by me! They also have a copy of the message. I'm told that a felony 'might' have been committed. If that was the case I WILL file charges against the person who made that threat, as a witness to it.

Of course the topic of discussion was then focused on Harriet Klausner yet again: Harriet's been clocked at 60 reviews A DAY. You can buy entire crates of the ARCs she's "reviewed" online. She does exist, and she does post the reviews. But I'd be amazed if she actually reads one book in a hundred. Ironic that you should make this claim just a few posts after noting that Klausner sells crates of the ARCs she receives. She's receiving those ARCs from people in the industry and she's far from the only Amazon reviewer to be provided with ARCs. Similarly, people in the industry pay enough attention to Amazon reviewers to produce thousands of ARCs for Amazon reviewers under the Amazon Vine program.

Candace Sams may think this is all a joke and not care what others think. I find it sad and pathetic. If I were an author, I rather my book read and reviewed, even if they are negative ones. No author wants a bad review but look at it this way- it’s better to have someone read your work than have no one read it at all. From those criticisms I can go on and write a better book. Too bad Sams doesn’t seen it this way and may have destroyed her reputation.

Oh, but KB how can a small kerfuffle on Amazon damage her reputation?

Have you heard of Neil Gaiman? He picked up on this and mentioned it on Twitter. He has over 1.3 million people following him there, not counting the countless others on Twitter who did the same thing, including me when I heard this.

Imagine if Sams hadn’t commented or just said, “Sorry my book didn’t work for you, but thanks for the review.”

Word of mouth is a very strong thing and in this case it showed how much power is behind it.

Also, Candace is very vocal about her experience with Dorchester on Absolute Write.

Scoundrel's Kiss Advanced Review *Carrie Lofty*

After I finished reading Scoundrel’s Kiss, one word came to mind- beauty. The beauty is in the words as well as the way Carrie Lofty makes her characters come alive. That’s what I think of in regards to Scoundrel’s Kiss. Carrie has written a courageous powerful tale that will leave you breathless. Some historical romances are pure fluff and very much like wallpaper, where it is pretty to look at but nothing else. This is definitely not the case when it comes to Carrie’s writing.

Ada of Keyworth escaped her life in England for the country of Toledo after a she was held captive by a most evil man who tortured her, as well as breaking all ties with her sister, who she felt betrayed her. Ada still can’t get passed the demons that plague her and even though she is a learned woman and a scholar of many languages who has found patronage an important lady, the Condesa de Valdedrona. Ada suffers daily because she has become addicted to opium. Her addiction has consumed her and helps her cope. She is about to lose everything for a drug that gives her sweet release, even if it means selling herself.

Gavriel de Marqueda is a novice monk who has joined the Order of Santiago. Through this Order, he will find absolution for his soul. Gavriel also has internal demons because of his past and the blood he feels he still has on his hands. He has taken a vow of chastity and must abstain from violence. His final test is to save an unfortunate soul and provide spiritual guidance where they will turn to the Church and redeem themselves of their wicked ways. Gavriel spots Ada, who in her opium induced haze, has been placed on an auction block as a slave to be bought and used in any way her new master seems fit. Gavriel saves her and now must break her of her addiction before all hope is lost.

Gavriel and Ada will be pushed to their limits as they travel to safety where danger surrounds them. Ada drives Gavriel to the brink, a fine line where he wants to strangle her as well as hold her close and claim her as his woman. All Ada wants is to be free, away from Gavriel, but he forces her to confront her selfishness and greed, and now she has found a new addiction, which Gavriel never sees coming because Ada longs for his touch and kindness over the drug that almost brought her to near ruin.

Scoundrel’s Kiss is filled with despair, angst and such drama told in such an exquisite way that a reader cannot help but feel every emotion Gavriel and Ada go through. These two suffer incredibly and you long for them to find a small piece of happiness with one other.

Ada is an interesting type of heroine who is strong as well as stubborn but also very intelligent. She sees things with a very critical mind and even though she may seem weak and suffers, that is really not the case. She brings forth many surprises, as well as Gavriel whose life is changed the moment Ada comes into it. And even though these two insult and push each other away, those moments when they feel relief or enjoy a bit of tenderness with one another, leads to respect and an all consuming passion that in turns becomes love.

Scoundrel’s Kiss has a near epic type feel to it in an exotic land with so many twist and turns. Carrie Lofty is a masterful storyteller who kept me hooked until the very last page. This is one much recommended romance. (January, Zebra)

Final Grade: A-

On a side note I will say that it is utter bull shit that Kensington Zebra line released Carrie as one of their authors. Zebra, you've lost a great talent. Publisher Fail on you!

67th Golden Globes 2010 Nominations

This is one of my favorite times of year because this is when a slew of award nominations are announced for movies and television.

This morning the 2010 Golden Globe nominations were announced, signaling the start of the Hollywood awards season. I can bet you that some of these nominated will also be up for an Oscar. The winners will be announced on January 17th.

Here are the nominations for the movie categories:

Best Picture, Drama:
Avatar
The Hurt Locker
Inglourious Basterds
Precious
Up In The Air

Best Picture, Comedy:
500 Days of Summer
The Hangover
It's Complicated
Julie & Julia
Nine

Best Director:
Kathryn Bigelow, The Hurt Locker
James Cameron, Avatar
Clint Eastwood, Invictus
Jason Reitman, Up In The Air
Quentin Tarantino, Inglourious Basterds

Best Actor in a Drama:
Jeff Bridges, Crazy Heart
George Clooney, Up In The Air
Colin Firth, A Single Man
Morgan Freeman, Invictus
Tobey Maguire, Brothers

Best Actress, Drama:
Emily Blunt, The Young Victoria
Sandra Bullock, The Blind Side
Helen Mirren, The Last Station
Carey Mulligan, An Education
Gabby Sidibe, Precious

Best Actress, Comedy:
Sandra Bullock, The Proposal
Marion Cotillard, Nine
Julia Roberts, Duplicity
Meryl Streep, It's Complicated
Meryl Streep, Julie & Julia

Best Actor, Comedy:
Matt Damon, The Informant!
Daniel Day-Lewis, Nine
Robert Downey Jr., Sherlock Holmes
Joseph Gordon-Levitt, 500 Days of Summer
Michael Stuhlbarg, A Serious Man

Best Supporting Actress:
Mo-Nique, Precious
Julianne Moore, A Single Man
Anna Kendrick, Up in the Air
Vera Farmiga, Up in the Air
Penelope Cruz, Nine

Best Supporting Actor:
Matt Damon, Invictus
Woody Harrelson, The Messenger
Stanley Tucci, The Lovely Bones
Christopher Plummer, The Last Station
Christoph Waltz, Inglourious Basterds

Best Screenplay:
District 9
The Hurt Locker
It's Complicated
Up In The Air
Inglourious Basterds

Best Foreign-Language Film:
Barria
Broken Embraces
The Maid
The Prophet
The White Ribbon

Best Animated Film:
Coraline
The Fantastic Mr. Fox
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs
The Princess and the Frog
Up

And for those who are Russel Crowe fans, the official trailer for his movie Robin Hood (May 14, 2010) has hit the internet. *grumble no Richard Armitage grumble*



And I can't fail to mention the much anticipated Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (December 23) movie trailer:



Which movie will you be seeing? Perhaps both?

Beautiful Creatures Book Review *Kami Garcia & Margaret Stohl*

Some loves are meant to be…
others are cursed.

There were no surprises
in Gatlin County.
At least, that’s what I thought.
Turns out, I couldn’t have
been more wrong.
There was a curse.
There was a girl.
And in the end,
there was a grave.

It’s hard to figure out what makes a book a winner in a reader’s eyes. For me it must have a wonderful setting and well-rounded interesting characters. But most importantly is the writing, where an author has a way at using words where they come off the pages. Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl have done all these things with Beautiful Creatures, an atmospheric gothic small town story that showcases a tender and sweet romance, and the inner realms of magic. The undercurrents of social acceptance is discussed in length and how small minds can bring forth so much damage to a community that refuses to grow, where they continue to live in their own small world.

Beautiful Creatures takes on the topic of bigotry, but not through race or religion but in regards to those who use magic and are so different from the norm, where it frightens a select group of misinformed and small thinking people. Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird is very much discussed in this book and used as an example, perhaps a bit too strongly. But anyone who has read To Kill a Mockingbird understands why that book and the message it portrays is so very important and makes the reader aware of both the light and darkness that resides in all our souls.

This idea of light and dark is the main focus in Beautiful Creatures. Nothing is gray, but very much black and white and told from the point of view from Ethan Wate, a sixteen- year old who lives with his father in the small town of Gatlin, South Carolina. Ethan’s father is a writer who locks himself up in his study for days on end. Not only to write his literary masterpiece, but to hide from Ethan and the loss of Ethan’s mother who only just died in a car accident. Because of Ethan’s parents influence, he enjoys reading and not just comic books but literary classics such as Cather in the Rye and Slaughterhouse-Five.

Ethan has learned early on that there are two types of people in Gaitlin, as his father states- “The ones who are bound to stay or too dumb to go. Everyone else finds a way out.” Ethan wants a way out. He has little over two more years until he can leave Gatlin. He’s sick of the people that live there; those that live in the past still, where the remnants of the Civil War are alive and well. There are no surprises in Gatlin that is until a new resident arrives. Her name is Lena Duchannes and the one Ethan has been waiting all his life for. Ethan has been having strange dreams about a mysterious girl and coincidently it is Lena, the niece of Old Man Macon Ravenwood, a recluse who makes, “Boo Radley look like a social butterfly”. Macon lives in a run-down plantation, one of the oldest in town. The student’s at Ethan’s high school decide early on that Lena is a freak because of her family ties. The boys think Lena is beautiful and mysterious, but because a few of Ethan’s female classmates, who are blonde haired, tanned and a fashionable, treat Lena as an outcast because she wears long dresses, black Converse sneakers and has dark curls. Both her parents are dead and she also drives the family hearse. Ethan is smitten the moment he sees her because of the connection they have.

Around the time Lena arrives, strange things start to happen. A song about sixteen moons and sixteen years plays on Ethan’s IPOD, one he has never heard of and vanishes as soon as he listens to it. The weather becomes unpredictable and whenever Lena is in a room the windows shatter. Lena soon has a reputation of being a witch and Ethan wants to get to the heart of the matter and find out who Lena is and why he can’t get her out of his mind. Ethan is much like a dog after a bone and tries to befriend Lena, even though she warns him to stay away. What these two don’t know is they both have a bond and need each other. They find out that their ancestors are responsible for a curse, and because of that Lena doesn’t have much time. Lena comes from a line of powerful relatives. She is known as a Caster, a gifted individual who has powers. Her Uncle Macon, as well as her grandmother and cousins do also. Lena feels she is living on borrowed time because in less than six months she turns sixteen and on her sixteenth birthday she will be claimed, where her fate is chosen and she will either become dark or light. That means Lena’s free will has been taken from her. She’s not meant to live among mortals and that means Ethan. If Lena goes dark, just like her cousin Ridley, she must leave her home and family because bad things will continue to happen if she remains.

Time is of the essence and Ethan won’t let Lena go. He will find a way to stop fate and figure out a way to make sure Lena doesn’t go dark. They must find a book of magic, the answer to breaking a one-hundred fifty year old curse, and stop the Gatlin community at large from their vendetta they have against Lena. There are many dark forces at play and lines will be drawn. And Ethan’s love for Lena may not be strong enough to save her.

Kami and Margaret deserve many accolades for penning such a tale like Beautiful Creatures. At over six-hundred pages this is a long, rich story that may seem slow moving, but it does fit the tone of the way of life in the south. Magic, love and suspense are all combined to create a tension filled world with very unique and eccentric characters.

Ethan and Lena are lovely together and I really couldn’t find any fault with their relationship and feelings for one another. Ethan may seem a bit too good to be true, but he has a great voice and the reader can see things perfectly through his eyes even though his actual physical description is a bit vague. Ethan may seem to be a typical teenage with ripped jeans, t-shirts, messy room, and love of basketball but underneath is the heart of a poet, a mature person who has grown old before his time because of his environment and lack of parental guidance. Ethan does has a grandmother type in his life, his housekeeper the mystical Amma, but Ethan’s father is a very pale and lacking character, unlike Lena’s family who comes across much like the Addams Family.

Because of these eccentric relatives of Lena’s to the opinions and ideas of the Gatlin people, I felt at times it was a bit too much and overwhelming. Ethan’s best friend Wesley “Link” Lincoln has a mother who should be a force to be reckoned with but is a bit too cartoonish, much like mustached twirling like villain. The reason for Mrs. Lincoln’s annoying personality is unveiled at the end but at that point I wanted to push her off a cliff. Also, the last fifty pages or so became a whirlwind reading experience. My head starting spinning from all the action occurring. Beautiful Creatures would have been a near perfect read for me if not for the final fight for Lena’s life.

Even thought I felt the actions of some of the characters too comical and the message of social acceptance and harmony Kami and Margaret were trying to get across was a bit too strong a times, Beautiful Creatures is an incredible book. Lessons are learned within these pages and that simple message that love conquers all rings true. The power of love and hope is very much a universal belief in life and in Beautiful Creatures. This is one book that goes in my top 10 for 2009 (Little Brown and Company)

Final Grade: A-
.

The Book Smugglers also posted their review of Beautiful Creatures today. Check it out.

RT Book Reviews 2009 Best in Romance Nominations

Last week RT Book Reviews magazine announced their picks for the best in the best romance novels for 2009. These nominations are much like The Golden Globe Awards for the romance genre community. I would say the Romance Writers of America RITA awards are more like The Oscars.

Here are some categories you may want to take notice of. Perhaps some of your favorite authors and their books are your picks for the best of the year. Some listed may shock you as well as may make you cheer.

Winners will be announced in the June issue of RT, just prior to their 27th annual Booklovers Convention in Columbus, Ohio, April 28 – May 2, 2010. Winners will be honored at a ceremony on Thursday, April 29.

Best Historical Romance:
THE VIRGIN’S SECRET- Victoria Alexander
DEVIL IN MY BED- Celeste Bradley
WICKED ALL DAY- Liz Carlyle
A WICKED LORD AT THE WEDDING- Jillian Hunter
DON’T BARGAINWITH THE DEVIL- Sabrina Jeffries
DARK VICTORY- Brenda Joyce
TEMPT ME AT TWILIGHT- Lisa Kleypas
MASTERED BY LOVE- Stephanie Laurens
A COURTESAN’S SCANDAL- Julia London
HOW TO TEMPT A DUKE- Kasey Michaels
MYSTIC WARRIOR- Patricia Rice
THE RUNAWAY MCBRIDE- Elizabeth Thornton

First Historical Romance:
GODDESS OF THE HUNT- Tessa Dare
SEDUCING THE HEIRESS -Olivia Drake
LADY OF SCANDAL- Tina Gabrielle
A TALENT FOR SIN- Lavinia Kent
A KNIGHT’S CAPTIVE- Lyndsay Townsend

Historical Paranormal:
SO ENCHANTING- Connie Brockway
TWILIGHT OF A QUEEN- Susan Carroll
SEDUCED BY YOUR SPELL- Lois Greiman
ENCHANTING THE BEAST- Kathryne Kennedy
SILVER SILENCE- Joy Nash
THE SCOT AND I- Elizabeth Thornton

Best Science Fiction:
MAELSTROM- Taylor Anderson
THE EMPRESS OF MARS- Kage Baker
IN THE COURTS OF THE SUN- Brian D’Amato
BLONDE ROOTS- Bernardine Evaristo
BLACK BLOOD- John Meaney
DIVING INTO THE WRECK- Kristine Kathryn Rusch

Best Urban Fantasy:
DYING BITES- DD Barant
BURN ME DEADLY- Alex Bledsoe
BONE CROSSED- Patricia Briggs
BITTER NIGHT- Diana Pharaoh Francis
DESTINED FOR AN EARLY GRAVE- Jeaniene Frost
DEAD AND GONE- Charlaine Harris
MAGIC IN THE BLOOD- Devon Monk

Best Contemporary:
TEMPTATION RIDGE- Robyn Carr
TRUE LOVE AND OTHER DISASTERS- Rachel Gibson
ALL THAT YOU ARE- Stef Ann Holm
SMOOTH TALKING STRANGER- Lisa Kleypas
FREUDIAN SLIP- Erica Orloff
WHAT I DID FOR LOVE- Susan Elizabeth Phillips

Best Contemporary Paranormal Romance:
ON THE EDGE- Ilona Andrews
KISS OF A DEMON KING- Kresley Cole
ATLANTIS UNLEASHED- Alyssa Day
PASSION UNLEASHED - Larissa Ione
DREAM WARRIOR- Sherrilyn Kenyon
BLOOD MAGIC- Jennifer Lyon

Paranormal Action Adventure Romance:
MAGIC’S DESIGN- Cat Adams
BURNING ALIVE- Shannon K.Butcher
HIDDEN CURRENTS- Christine Feehan
BRANDED BY FIRE- Nalini Singh

Paranormal Fiction:
COLD MOON RISING- C.T. Adams & Cathy Clamp
THE THIRTEENTH- L.A. Banks
DEMON FORGED- Meljean Brook
KISS & HELL- Dakota Cassidy
HUNTER’S NEED- Shiloh Walker
COVET- J.R. Ward

Best African America Romance:
MAN OF FATE- Rochelle Alers
MAKE YOU MINE- Niobia Bryant Dafina
TASTE OF PASSION- Brenda Jackson
BRING ON THE BLESSINGS- Beverly Jenkins
NOBODY BUT YOU- Francis Ray

Best Inspirational:
DOUBLE MINDS- Terri Blackstock
SHADOWS OF LANCASTER COUNTY- Mindy Starns Clark
A BRIDE IN THE BARGAIN- Deeanne Gist
SISTERCHICKS IN WOODEN SHOES-
AGAINST ALL ODDS -Irene Hannon
SHE’S IN A BETTER PLACE- Angela Hunt

Best Young Adult:
TEN THINGS I HATE ABOUT ME- Randa Abdel–Fattah
WINTERGIRLS- Laurie Halse Anderson
FREAKS AND REVELATIONS- Davida Wills Hurwin
I AM A GENIUS OF UNSPEAKABLE EVIL AND I WANT TO BE YOUR CLASS PRESIDENT- Josh Lieb
HOW TO SAY GOODBYE IN ROBOT- Natalie Standiford

Young Adult Paranormal/Fantasy:
THE AWAKENING- Kelley Armstrong
TEMPTED- P.C. & Kristin Cast
THE MAZE RUNNER- James Dashner
SHADOWLAND- Alyson Noël
WINGS- Aprilynne Pike

Best Erotic/ Erotic Romance:
SWEET PERSUASION- Maya Banks
LAID BARE- Lauren Dane
BOUND TO PLEASE- Lilli Feisty
LUKE- Cheyenne McCray
THE SWEET SPOT- Kimberly Kaye Terry

Romantic Suspense/ Romantic Intrigue:
LOVE YOU TO DEATH- Shannon K. Butcher
FIRE AND ICE- Julie Garwood
FEEL THE HEAT- Cindy Gerard
DEAD RIGHT- Cate Noble
THE PERFECT MURDER- Brenda Novak
MAKE HER PAY- Roxanne St. Claire

Why no GLBT categories? RT Book Reviews doesn’t review GLBT books.

For the total list of categories: Click Here.

Future Releases: KB Pimpin Cookie Covers

Some nom future released and their le nom "cookie" covers to place on your radar...

It has been so long since I've read a good Sheikh romance. Kismet by Monica Burns coming in January From Berkley.

Synopsis: Raised in a brothel at a young age, Allegra Synnford quickly learned that survival meant taking charge of her destiny. Now, a renowned courtesan skilled in the pleasures of the flesh, she chooses her lovers carefully—vowing never to be vulnerable to any one man. Until a mesmerizing Sheikh strips that control from her…

Sheikh Shaheen of the Amazigh has been hiding from his past for a long time, but not enough to forget how another courtesan made him abandon his life as the Viscount Newcastle. It’s why the yearnings this dangerous temptress ignites within him are so troubling. Worse, thoughts of Allegra pervade every fantasy, threatening to undermine his cover. With old enemies circling, experience tells him he must resist her charms at all cost. In fact, he’s betting on it. That’s a risky wager when it comes to a woman of pleasure. But Allegra has her own reasons for playing games…with a man who can’t afford to lose.

This is a new to me author. Twice Dead by Kalayna Price (Book 2 in Haven series). Coming in February from Bell Bridge Books.

*NO SYNOPSIS GIVEN*

The title sounds cheesy but the cover looks hot. Her Vampire Husband by Michele Hauf (Book 3 in Wicked Games series) coming in April from HQN.

Synopsis: Werewolf princess Blu Masterson won't allow her seductive vampire husband to consummate their marriage with his bite, marking her forever. Alone in a secluded estate with her sworn enemy, Blu curses the marriage arranged to bring their rival nations together, especially since Creed Saint-Pierre calls out to her most feral desires. When Blu uncovers her pack's secret plot to destroy the vampire nation—and Creed—she is forced to confront her growing feelings for her sexy undead husband. Will she choose the only life she's ever known or accept his vampire bite?

Thanks to Sci Fi Guy for this new YA book. White Cat by Holly Black coming in May from Margaret K. McElderry.

Synopsis: Cassel comes from a family of curse workers—people who have the power to change your emotions, your memories, your luck, by the slightest touch of their hands. And since curse work is illegal, they’re all criminals. Many become mobsters and con artists. But not Cassel. He hasn’t got magic, so he’s an outsider, the straight kid in a crooked family. You just have to ignore one small detail—he killed his best friend, Lila, three years ago.

Cassel has carefully built up a façade of normalcy, blending into the crowd. But his façade starts crumbling when he finds himself sleepwalking, propelled into the night by terrifying dreams about a white cat that wants to tell him something. He’s noticing other disturbing things, too, including the strange behavior of his two brothers. They are keeping secrets from him. As Cassel begins to suspect he’s part of a huge con game, he must unravel his past and his memories. To find out the truth, Cassel will have to out-con the con men.

Sweetest Little Sin by Christine Wells. Coming in May from Berkley.

Synopsis: Lady Louisa Brooke has many suitors, but the only man for her is the wild and ruthless Marquis of Jardine. When Jardine suddenly abandons her after a long-standing liaison, he leaves her with nothing except the secret they share. Her future in ruins, Louisa recklessly accepts a mission from the head of the secret service and becomes embroiled in a perilous operation in which nothing is as it seems. The Marquis of Jardine is determined to destroy the criminal mastermind whose sworn vengeance against all he holds dear. But when he hears that Louisa is to wed a dangerous enemy, Jardine is tortured by jealousy and fear for her safety. He tracks her down, only to discover that her mission collides with his.

Thanks to Wendy the Super Libarian for this future release. Maid to Match by Deeane Gist coming in June from Bethany House.

Synopsis: From the day she arrives at the Biltmore, Tillie Reese is dazzled--by the riches of the Vanderbilts and by Mack Danvers, a mountain man turned footman. When Tillie is enlisted to help tame Mack's rugged behavior by tutoring him in the ways of refined society, the resulting sparks threaten Tillie's efforts to be chosen as Edith Vanderbilt's lady's maid. But the stakes rise even higher when Mack and Tillie become entangled in a cover-up at the town orphanage. They could both lose their jobs...and their hearts.

I saw this on the Pure Imagination blog and thought the cover to be very haunting. Wicked Girls by Stephanie Hemphill coming in July from Hyperion.

Synopsis: Wicked Girls is a fictionalized account of the Salem witch trials based on the real historical characters, told from the perspective of three young women living in Salem in 1692—Mercy Lewis, Margaret Walcott, and Ann Putnam Jr. When Ann’s father suggests that a spate of illnesses within the village is the result of witchcraft, Ann sees an opportunity and starts manifesting the symptoms of affliction. Ann looks up to Mercy, the beautiful servant in her parents' house. She shows Mercy the power that a young girl is capable of in a time when women were completely powerless. Mercy, who suffered abuse at the hands of past masters, seizes her only chance at safety. And Ann’s cousin Margaret, anxious to win the attention of a boy in her sights, follows suit. As the accusations mount against men and women in the community, the girls start to see the deadly ramifications of their actions. Should they finally tell the truth? Or is it too late to save this small New England town?

Also, some future releases for 2010 that have been announced on Amazon that I can't wait to read and you may want to know about: *no covers yet*

Wicked Becomes You by Meredith Duran coming in April from Pocket

Ten Things I Love About You by Julia Quinn coming in May from Avon

Into the Crossfire by Lisa Marie Rice coming in July from Avon Red

Lash of Need (Max’s Book) by Nalini Singh coming in July from Berkley

Lady Isabella’s Scandalous Marriage (Sequel to The Madness of Lord Ian Mackenzie) by Jennifer Ashley coming in July from Berkley

Last Night's Scandal by Loretta Chase coming in July from Avon. We have a synopsis! Thank to The Book Smugglers and right from Loretta’s mouth: Olivia and Peregrine of LORD PERFECT return. In that story–#3 of my Carsington books–they were twelve and thirteen years old. LAST NIGHT’S SCANDAL brings them back ten years later. Olivia has become a great beauty, and she’s still the Regency version of Lady Maverick. Peregrine, the Earl of Lisle, has been making a name for himself as an Egyptologist, a Regency-era Indiana Jones. In other words, some things haven’t changed; they’ve simply developed. Though they’ve been apart for long stretches, they’ve stayed close through their letters, which Olivia composes by the ream. When Lisle comes back for an important Carsington family event, Olivia upends his well-ordered life again. He ends up on the road with her again, this time with a couple of bawdy old ladies along to complicate matters–and headed for a haunted castle in Scotland.

Demon from the Dark by Kresley Cole coming in August from Pocket

Enjoy your future cover cookie books...

WTFckery Or Not? You Decide

1. Need a special type of mixer for your kitchen? let's be honest, it looks like a vibrator.

Rabbit Mixer
This Rabbit designed mixer could make you laugh every time you use it in the kitchen for all your mixing needs. *yeah, I bet you laugh and giggle everytime you use it*

2. This is just so WTFckery sad. From TMZ.com:

Multiple Burger King restaurants across the country are reporting life-size promotional posters of Taylor Lautner and Robert Pattinson are being ripped right off the BK windows in broad daylight ... horrible time for a vampire. So far, the interstate theft has affected BKs in Maine, Delaware and Montana. One Burger King rep tell us, "The girls just walk up in the middle of the day ... rip off the posters and run ... we've had to replace them over and over."

3. This is a WTFckery because the dude has an octopus on his head. But it is from Sesame Street and is teaching children an important lesson. I think Jake Gyllenhaal is enjoying himself way too much.


4. Good to know that American colleges are concerned about cutting costs as well as caring about your health.


5. Tis the season to travel and while you are on those long lines at the airport or stuck in the car and need some substance, why not have your own Sauage Briefcase? Thanks to Chris at Stumbling Over Chaos for this one.



6. Less than 2 weeks until Christmas! or if you need another gift to give that loved one during Chanukah, why not Smoking Baby? It's under $10 and it comes with a pack of ten Lil Smokes and has another one in its mouth, ready to light up and puff. The smokes are actually non-toxic, unscented incense wrapped in paper.
7. Oh Cake Wrecks, I can't quit you especially when you have some really WTF cakes on your blog. Can we say poop on a cupcake?


8. And your Regretsy WTFckery of the week! *I actually think the wee wee warmer is a cute idea*

Don't all guys need a combination beer cozy and jock strap with buttons as eyes?

Too bad it's sold out.

Enjoy this week in WTFckery...

Also, if you spot any WTFckery, send me email and I will post them.

You Choose: The Aww Or The Nom

If you could choose one of these to bring home, which one would it be?

The Aww

The Nom

Decisions... Decisions...

Love Advice From Love Doctor Mho Fho *Forced to Seduce Gentleman Virgin*

Welcome to the latest Saturday Edition of Love Letters to Mho! The Love Doctor is in!

Dear Mister Mho Fho,

I am a poor widow who has been drugged, kidnapped and forced to become the mistress to a so-called madman. If I don’t, the evvvvviiiilll man who planned all of this will have me raped by his men or kill me either way.

The madman (MM) is a Marquess who has been imprisoned by his uncle for over ten years and thought to be crazed because of a fever that affected his brain. MM is a kind soul who enjoys gardening, writing and has a dog. He wants to help me but thinks it’s useless because anyone who has helped him in the past has come to a bad end.

Also, MM is a virgin and since my marriage was lacking in the sex department, I can only just lie there while he has his wicked, yet innocent way with me.

Please help!

Poor Widow G




Dear Widow G,

Your situation is very different from the usual love advice letters I receive. I sympathize with your plight to be stuck with, and I assume, a gorgeous man with sharply cut cheekbones, sinewy leanness, beautiful unusual eyes and stands more than six feet tall. And the shock you have gone through and being forced to succumb to the intimates with a rich lord of the realm who is a virgin is heartbreaking!

Gain MM’s trust and work together to defeat his evviiiiillll uncle who only pops up a few times to threaten you. In order for you and MM to escape, you will have to engage in the delights of the bedroom because as soon as MM tastes your raspberry colored nipples and enjoys you flushed, plump sex folds that remind him of beautiful flower, he will come to the conclusion that you are his one true love even though he has never touched another woman. And because you are a so-called heroine in peril, you have what is called the magic hoo-haa. As long as your hoo-haa and his soon-to-be experienced tallywhacker find nirvana with one another, everything will work out. Soon you will be a widow no longer and the evvvviiillll uncle will get his just desserts in the end.

Sincerely,

Mho Fho

Need a hint on who is asking for advice? Click Here